Doing the Woke

“The more these women agreed to be shamed for their ‘whiteness,’ the more I wondered why doing so made them feel ethical. Feeling shame makes nobody ethical. Just uncomfortable.”

When Aunt Bettie liked you, she called you a Christian. This proved awkward when my family brought Dad’s ashes home to North Carolina, where he and Aunt Bettie were raised.

“My, my,” she said to the family friend who held Dad’s hand as he lay dying, soothing his dry mouth with lemon pops. “You sure are a Christian woman!”

A look passed between the friend and me: a questioning look. Smiling, our friend gently offered, “Well, no, actually. I’m not.”

My aunt looked as though someone had slapped her. “You’re not?” she asked. “Not even a little bit?” Fear spread over her worn, kindly features. Had the pearly gates slammed shut for this lovely person?

The friend explained: “I was born into a Jewish family.” A pause ensued, one lasting a very long minute. During that pause, I suspect, my aunt was praying for the friend’s soul. Finally, she said, “Well, my views on Jews have changed somewhat in the past few years!”